Regular Meetings

The DeKalb Grief Support Group meets on the first and third Thursday of each month at 6:30 PM at the offices of Synergy Counseling Center located at 701 Gault Avenue N, Fort Payne, Alabama 35967.

This is a public service.

For more information, call (256) 979-1620.

Regular Meetings

The DeKalb Grief Support Group meets on the first and third Thursday of each month at 6:30 PM at the offices of Synergy Counseling Center located at 701 Gault Avenue N, Fort Payne, Alabama 35967.

This is a public service.

For more information, call or text (256) 979-1620.

Regular Meetings

The DeKalb Grief Support Group meets on the first and third Thursday of each month at 6:30 PM at the offices of Synergy Counseling Center located at 701 Gault Avenue N, Fort Payne, Alabama 35967.

This is a public service.

For more information, call or text (256) 979-1620.

Regular Meetings

The DeKalb Grief Support Group meets on the first and third Thursday of each month at 6:30 PM at the offices of Synergy Counseling Center located at 521 Gault Avenue N, Fort Payne, Alabama 35967.

This is a public service.

For more information, call or text (256) 418-0620.

Graveside Grief

(A prayer.)

They never planned to bring their child here, Father.

They planned to bring their child to school, to the zoo, to kindergarten, to the beach…

But here? No.

To piano lessons? Yes.

To soccer fields? Yes.

To graduation? Yes.

But here? Never. No parent plans to bring his child here.

Children bring parents here. Isn't that the order of things? Sons and daughters bury moms and dads. Who can bear the weight of this reversal? Who can stand to stand near the grave of their child?

Such a deep sorrow. This elixir of regret, remorse, second thoughts, and “if onlys”… Who can abide its taste?

We pray for these parents, Father. Our kindest words fall like empty husks. Help us  know how to help them.

You know. You've been here.

You brought your Son to a cemetery. You witnessed the silent tomb. Yet, you resurrected hope from that tragedy.

Would you bring hope again?

Through Jesus,

Amen

(by Max Lucado)

Goals

• Helping people develop more positive attitudes and better interpersonal skills
• Facilitate behavioral change
• Helping people transfer newly acquired skills and behavior to everyday life

Meeting Announcement

The DeKalb Grief Support Group mets Thursday, March 21, 2013, at 6:30 PM, at the Synergy Counseling Center in Fort Payne.  The public is invited.  Refreshments will be served.  There is no costs to participants.

Regular meetings are held every first and third Thursday.

Next Meeting

The DeKalb Grief Support Group will meet Thursday, January 17, 2013 at 6:30 PM at the Synergy Counseling Center in Fort Payne, Alabama.  The public is invited.

Meeting This Week

The DeKalb Grief Support Group meets Thursday, January 3, 2012 at 6:30 PM.

For more information, CLICK HERE.

This is a public service.  Everyone welcome.  Bring someone with you.

Merry Christmas

Don & Yvonne Brock
From our home to yours.

Dealing With Grief: Five Things NOT To Say And Five Things To Say In A Trauma Involving Children

We often have no idea what to say in the face of senseless loss.  That is especially true when children are the victims of tragedy.  The tragic school shooting in Connecticut is heartbreaking in so many ways, not the least of which is the staggering loss of children.

Over the years as a hospital chaplain, I have heard some of the worst theology of my life coming from people who thought they were bringing comfort to the parents.  More often than not, they weren't.  And often, they made the situation worse.

Here are five things not to say to grieving family and friends:

1. "God just needed another angel." - Portraying God as someone who arbitrarily kills kids to fill celestial openings is neither faithful to God, nor helpful to grieving parents.
2. "Thank goodness you have other children," or, "You're young.  You can have more kids." - Children are not interchangeable or replaceable.  The loss of a child will always be a loss, no matter how many other children a parent has or will have.
3. He/she was just on loan to you from God. - The message is that God is so capricious that God will break parents' hearts at will just because God can.  It also communicates to parents and loved ones that they are not really entitled to their grief.
4. God doesn't give you more than you can handle. - Actually, some people do get a lot more than any one person should ever have to handle.  And it doesn't come from God.  Don't trivialize someone's grief with a "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger" mentality.
5. We may not understand it, but this was God's will. - Unless you are God, don't use this line.

And here are five things to say:

1. I don't believe God wanted this or willed it. - A grieving friend or family member is likely hearing that this is God's will from a number of other people.  Affirm the idea that it may very well not be.
2. It's okay to be angry, and I'm a safe person for you express that anger to if you need it. - Anger is an essential part of the grieving process, but many don't know where to talk about it because they are often silenced by others when they express their feelings. (For instance, they may be told they have no right to be angry at God.) By saying you are a safe person to share all feelings, including anger, with, you help the grieving person know where they can turn.
3. It's not okay. - It seems so obvious, but sometimes this doesn't get said. Sometimes the pieces don't fit. Sometimes nothing works out right. And sometimes there is no way to fix it. Naming it can be helpful for some because it lets them know you won't sugarcoat their grief.
4. I don't know why this happened. - When trauma happens, the shock and emotion comes first. But not long after comes our human need to try to explain "why?" The reality is that often we cannot. The grieving person will likely have heard a lot of theories about why a trauma occurred. Sometimes it's best not to add to the chorus, but to just acknowledge what you do not know.
5. I can't imagine what you are going through, but I am here to support you in whatever way feels best. - Even if you have faced a similar loss, remember that each loss is different. Saying "I know how you're feeling" is often untrue. Instead, ask how the grieving person is feeling. And then ask what you can do to help. Then, do it and respect the boundaries around what they don't want help with at this point. You will be putting some control back into the hands of the grieving person, who often feels like they have lost so much of it.

[by Rev. Emily C. Heath, Huffington Post]

The Biggest Misconceptions About Grief

When it comes to dealing with grief, we’re a lot more resilient than we think we are.  According to Time magazine, a lot of our beliefs about grief come from psychiatrist Dr. Elizabeth Kubler-Ross, who called grief a "process" – and defined the five stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance.  These stages have sometimes been misunderstood.  We will attempt to offer some clarity:

1. The biggest misconception is: We have to grieve in stages.  A new study in Journal of the American Medical Association found that most people accepted the death of a loved one from the very beginning, not at the end.  Instead of the "expected" anger or depression, they reported more of a "yearning" for their absent loved one.
2. Grief must be expressed instead of repressed?  The fact is: Expressing anger and other negative emotions can actually prolong your grief.  A study found that those who avoided confronting the loss of a spouse or child were less depressed and anxious two years later, and had fewer health complaints than those who "worked through" their grief.
3. Grief is harder on women?  That idea came from a study in the early 1970's, when women relied more on their husbands for their sense of identity and financial security.  In fact, many were full-time homemakers who didn't even know how to drive.  In a more recent study, men and women were about even.
4. Grief never ends?  Researchers today say that the worst grief is usually over in about six months.  The bereaved still missed their spouse or child, but they function normally.

Meeting Notice

The DeKalb Grief Support Group meets November 15 at 6:30 PM.  The public s invited.

The group meets on the first and third Thursday of every month at 521 Gault Avenue N in Fort Payne.

Meetings Resume!

The DeKalb County Alabama Grief Support Group resumes regular meetings on Thursday, October 4, 2012.  The Grief Support Group will be meeting at 6:30 PM on the first and third Thursday in the lobby of the Synergy Counseling Center at 521 Gault Avenue N in Fort Payne.  The public is invited.  This is a community service.

NO Meeting

We will not be meeting again until further notice.

We are working on a permanent meeting place.  We hope the remodeling will be done soon.

We will post here as soon as we are ready to meet again.

Grief Support Group in Fort Payne, Alabama

Are you suffering from the loss of a family member or friend? Does the pain never seem to end? You are invited to the next DeKalb Grief Support Group meeting;

Tuesday

August 16, 2011

6:30 PM to 8:00 PM

315 2nd Street NW

Fort Payne, AL 35967

This is the Wallace Hall Home on the corner of 2nd Street N and Forrest Avenue.

Bring your family and friends. There is no cost to participants.

This Grief Support Group meets the first and third Tuesday at 6:30 PM. The public is invited.

CLICK HERE for a map and directions.

Hope After Loss

When tragedy strikes, it can rob your sense of hope. It tampers with your ability to believe in the best that life can offer. How can you be optimistic when you know the worst case scenario not only can happen but already has?

First, you have to deal with the grief and this can take a long time. Loss is a powerful event that can’t be swept under the rug. It’s important to talk to someone to sort out your feelings: a friend, support group, counselor, therapist, perhaps even your doctor. There are people out there who can help you through this process. You don’t have to go it alone.

Eventually, you’ll find your way back to happiness again. Whatever happened to you will no longer hold you prisoner, and the fear won’t compare to the freedom you feel to enjoy life to its fullest.

I don’t think we ever really get over a crisis or “move on”. Instead, we grow. We take all we’ve learned and continue growing. Trusting in the goodness of life is part of that. Instead of dreading the next calamity, we hope for impending joy. I know it’s difficult, but I also know it’s possible. I’ve seen it happen.

“I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it.” – Maya Angelou

[from beliefnet]

Death of a Christian

There is a grief that is biblical (1 Thess. 4:13), but it is different from that of the unbeliever. Why?

Well, first of all the believer who died has gained by his death (2 Cor 5), because he is now with Christ which is far better. Those believers he leaves behind grieve (he doesn’t), because they “lose” him. Grief has solely to do with those remaining behind—so they are sorry for themselves—that they no longer have his presence with them. But, unlike unbelievers, they know where he is and rejoice for him. At death (among believers), then, there is both gain and loss. Among unbelievers there is nothing but loss– for both the dying and for those left behind. There is no gain for anyone. What a difference!

Moreover, for the believer and his believing dead loved one, there is nothing permanent about the loss; he will be with his loved one once more when he goes to be with the Lord.

So the fundamental difference has to do with gain and loss—but what a difference it is!

[by Jay Adams]

You Are Invited

Are you suffering from the loss of a family member or friend? Does the pain never seem to end? You are invited to the next DeKalb Grief Support Group meeting;

Tuesday

February 1, 2010

6:30 PM

315 2nd Street NW

Fort Payne, AL 35967

This is the Wallace Hall Home on the corner of 2nd Street N and Forrest Avenue.

Bring your family and friends. There is no cost to participants.

This Grief Support Group meets the first and third Tuesday at 6:30 PM. The public is invited.

CLICK HERE for a map and directions.

Grief Support Group in Fort Payne